I came back from a journey recently. I was gone long enough that in coming home I had to decide whether to be the person I was on my journey, or return to what was most comfortable.
The tug-o-war has been fun.
It is easier to compartmentalize. To justify and say: “Well, who I was on that journey doesn’t really fit back here at home.” Or, “I would be kidding myself to think I could keep up that lifestyle here.”
Like I said, it’s been a tug-o-war.
I hear this from people every day in my coaching. We’ve nailed some incredible insight or my client has released some block that has been holding them back for years, and then a week later:
“How are things since we spoke last?”
And then I hear it. I hear myself.
“That insight was great and all but…”
The decision to live from this new insight is staring them, me, in the face and it’s too much. It’s easier just to ignore it.
I’m writing about this because it fascinates me. I’m in awe at what we give power to in our lives, even when we know better.
So how do we make the transition? How do we successfully walk out of an old state of mind to a new one? How do we stay put in a better reality?
I wish there was a simple answer.
As I think about all the transitions we make in life and the inevitable changes that occur when our families expand and contract, when life expands and contracts, I feel called to one place, one space: TRUTH.
Truth has been the one thing I cannot ignore. When I think back to my journey and I remember all of the insights and changes I made, I know they are true. When I am in conflict back here at home—the fight between who I was and what I want to become—I know in my heart the conflict is true, it’s a real one. I don’t have to run away from it.
Tough decisions are unavoidable. Change is a part of life. Decisions stick when they are true and change is easier when it rings true.
As this wonderful community faces the unavoidable changes of life, the amazing and difficult changes that come with deciding to start a family, or a new career, or retirement, let me lend one piece of sage advice:
not going all the way, and not starting.” -Buddha
I hope we will all continue on our paths toward truth. I hope I will.
His mentoring company, Kaiizen Mentors, is helping youth and families in the States live better lives.